Coming out as a Tantrika of Christ: A Love Story, A Reclamation

First Love

My first remembering of the sacred fire that dances within came in a little white country church in rural America, singing "Away in a Manger" for the Sunday School Christmas program. I felt the fire of His love dance in my being and my body. I was just a girl, and I knew divine love from within me.

That moment left an ache and a longing, a holy hunger to feel that fire dance again. I would chase it in travel across the globe, around roller derby rinks, in hustle and achievement, through art and creativity, up to and including polyamorous relationships all in search of Divine Union.

Faith + Formation

This mystic was born to a family of devoted Lutherans — the German-Russian, stoic kind, whose ancestors fled their homelands in pursuit of religious freedom. They succeeded in installing the fear of God in me while also modeling faith as the foundation of life.

My longing continued to grow. The ache deepened. I sought the truth of God. I longed to reconcile the God I was taught in church with the God I knew as love, from within my body. The quest to fill the longing continued through countless churches, spiritual circles, teachers and traditions — all the while carrying the sacred questions in my bones: “What gave Jesus the power to heal? How do I follow the command of Jesus and learn to love others as God loves?"

A Homecoming to my temple

Jesus, sex, and orgasm have always come together for me —(pun fully intended). Sex is an expression of love. Jesus is the way to true, divine, embodied love. Sex is a form of worship.

Jesus gave His life so I could be free — free from the shame and sin projected onto this body, this temple. And that’s what made "Jesus Tantra" make perfect sense to me.

I had been searching for years for a model and practice of spirituality that could hold all of me — my sacred yes, my holy no, my hunger for God, my desire for sacred union, and a practice of divine devotion.

But nothing quite landed for me. The church wasn’t it (obviously). The new age scene definitely wasn’t it. Even the healing arts and practices — with all their light — mostly ignored the animal body or bypassed the ache of real human longing. I needed a grounded spiritual practice that honored sexual experience as sacred union —true communion with the Divine, through ritual, relationship, and practice.

I found all of this — and more — in a week-long immersion into SkyDancing Tantra.

The lineage’s founder, Margot Anand — known as the “Bliss Hunter” — shared that she felt God in her first orgasm. She spent her life on a holy quest to understand that experience and to help others reclaim it.

The sacred container of SkyDancing Tantra offers many chances to dance with your own divine. To feel real embodiment of Shiva and Shakti. It's a structured experience to live in Sacred Union with your soul as you reclaim your body, the temple, and the sacred within.

In that week, I came home. To my body. To my breath. To my "yes" — fully expressed and alive. To my "no" — courageous and sovereign. I remembered myself as priestess, as lover, as temple, as tantrika. We jumped into the pool naked, again and again —laughing, calling out in ecstasy, reclaiming our innocence.

I felt an aliveness in my body that had never been touched. I was free in my divine expression —held, loved, and mirrored by a community of light beings doing the same sacred work.

Why Now?

We are in a time of great spiritual vulnerability. Wounded by humanity, numbed by noise, disconnected from our own divinity — our society is unwell. And in this unwellness, many are turning to false light. Healers who are not whole. Teachers who do not walk their talk. Leaders who lead not through love, but through manipulation, performance, and fear.

For some, politics have become their god. For others, popularity is their pulpit. They project a kind of spirituality that I reject —one that feeds on confusion, exploits ache, and poisons the sacred.

This is why I am speaking now. I am not here to sell a brand of spirituality. I am not here to make you follow me. I am here to witness something real —a connection to God that lives within you, that asks for your truth, your integrity, your inner authority.

God is not outside of you. God is within.

I do not seek to have power over another, but to point people back to the power of love within them.

This is how we create a new world —one of loving order, right relationship, and peace. A world where we remember the sacredness of life. A world that radiates a universal field of harmlessness. A world in which we no longer mistake performance for presence, and manipulation for medicine.

For those I walk with

I create my soul offerings to serve people just like me — those who find themselves “unchurched,” yet still deeply devoted. Those who have longed for a spiritual home and struggled to find connection and community in religious institutions.

I’m here for the ones who have been cancelled for their politics, silenced for their convictions, or made to feel like they don’t belong in spiritual spaces because they question, disrupt, or see through illusion. I am here for women in transition who feel lost to themselves in motherhood, marriage, divorce, burnout, or big identity shifts. For those who have spent years giving themselves away and are finally ready to reclaim their radiance. I’m here for those who carry religious trauma — who were taught to be ashamed of their body, their pleasure, or their power. I am here for the men who never found a safe place to land with their feelings. For the ones who were taught to perform strength but never shown how to be tender. I am here for those walking the sacred path of recovery.

I offer this path for those who are tired of spiritual performance and hungry for something real — a place where worship, play, rest, and sacred connection can be lived, not just performed.

For the seekers, the healers, the mystics. For the ones who are ready to experience the truth of their divinity, not as a concept, but as a living, embodied presence within. You are the ones I walk with. You are the ones I serve.

The Future of Your Higher Path Healing as a Ministry

If you ask anyone who has received healing on my table, they’ll likely struggle to put their experience into words. That’s because what we do together is not transactional — it’s mystical. It’s a remembrance. Each session is different. Each healing container is alive, sacred, and unrepeatable. The journey between sessions unfolds on divine time — sometimes quickly, sometimes over seasons.

For the past seven years, I’ve shown up to this work in devotion. But now, Your Higher Path is undergoing a sacred rebirth. A new chapter is calling — one that reflects my soul’s path more fully.

I am no longer just offering healing services. I am tending a ministry.

This next evolution of Your Higher Path will offer clear, grounded containers of embodied devotion — where healing, worship, rest, and sacred play meet. Where nervous systems regulate in community, where sacred conversations are had without fear, and where we remember our wholeness, together.

A Closing Invitation

If you’ve been feeling it too — the longing, the ache, the disillusionment with what’s being sold as “spirituality” — know that you are not alone. There is another way. A higher path.

I invite you to walk with me. To remember the love that lives within your body. To reclaim your spiritual authority. To be part of a ministry that welcomes your full, embodied presence.

I don’t promise perfection. But I do promise reverence. Devotion. And containers of depth, honesty, and love.

Thank you for walking with me.

Photo taken by Lance - Lake Independence Full Moon July 2025